this is one part of my life i have never shared cus i am ashamed but if it helps others im going to share

when i was at the lowest in my life even as a teenager i just got out of control not me a human being but me as a nobody in this world

i started mixing with the wrong croud and my sister got her self in to trouble to she used to go out late at night and she didnt come back untill late the day

even thoe i didnt have a relationship with my sister through the favourtism and the jelously i still loved her in my heart and didnt want to see her hurt by nobody

if my sister was in trouble i was there but this one night i followed my sister and she used to wait in a place were cars used to stop and she would get in and not come back for half an hour and hour at a time and i used to wait then the one night i confronted my sister and she told me what she was doing


and i so could not believe it but then that made me worry more and more and especially for her saftey cus i did used to watch the news and i knew how dangerous prostitution was and i just couldnt understand why she would do it

so every time she went out i followed her to make sure she was ok but as time went on she had met a guy and he was a pimp and she started working for  him

but i dont know why but i could sence people and he was not good at all

my sister started coming home with bruises and i kept asking how you done this and she would get nasty and tell me to mind my buisness politly

so this one night i followed her to a flat were the pimp was and i knocked on the flat door and nobody would answer i heard voices and knew my sister was there

eventually the door was opened and i pushed my way in my sister was crying in the bedroom the pimp had a kettle cord in is hand and i stood in front of sister and i told him to leave her alone and i had some virble and he said if i didnt move i would get it instead and i said well you am going to have to hurt me cus u aint hurting my sister anymore

and in a split second boy did o know what pain felt like but i still didnt back dwn and in the end he stopped and i said to my sister who could not believe what she saw i said know get your stuff and please lets go and she did

but days later she went again and didnt come back for days when she did eventually come back

she only came back for her stuff she was going to move in a flat in pleck with another girl and i just could not believe her i said to my sister why in gods name do you do this and why do you put your self in positions were you going to be hurt and she said its the money

then my heart sank i knew i could nt stop her but just protect her

then after time went by and i became arun away from care my self what did i do but get mixed up in the same thing to survive

i should of know better because of what my sister suffered but when i was in trouble nobody was there for me and the lonliness and fright is unreal

especially when you dont see things coming your way

but when you are a runaway from care and you are all alone and no money

cant eat and no were to live its lonley and feeling lost

i know i should of learnt from my sister suffering but life never goes the way you want too and i so never wanted my life to end up the way it did


its because all the young girls out there who are doing the same

or who are thinking of the same please think twice

because prostitution is not a game

its dangerous

and you can loose your lives

is money really worth loosing your life or been scared for life

no it  is not believe me

but it does prove one thing too been a run away from care just because you are been abused in the system and nobody will believe you it makes you seriously think in side is there really any justice in the world

and am the systems really failling young children and teenagers for the right reasons

or the wrong reasons

for me to share this is the hardest thing i have had to share in my life because it made feel dirty and me have no respect for my self but let me tell all the young girls and women out there

you are so much better than what u all think and there is help out there dont put ur selfs in a position were you are risking your lives through just money


know this part of my life is dead iv put it too rest

so please i urge all of you to please listen better your selves dont think your a nobody cus you all are a somebody

thank you

clare wakeman


2 thoughts on “this is one part of my life i have never shared cus i am ashamed but if it helps others im going to share

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